Oh my. November 16, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — beyondtheoutside @ 2:52 PM

Transitions are so hard. Whether its school, friends, weather or ANYTHING! It’s hard to switch from doing things one way to doing things another. And lately, I’ve been in a transition period of my life in a specific area. It’s really a weird thing too. Like, everything i was used to and knew and had conformed to, change. I’m learning new ways to get by, new ways to do things. I’m ok with this change, but I must say it’s one of the ‘oddest’ times of my life. Now, not EVERYTHING in this area is changing, but MOST of it. I’m loving it and know its for my best, but it’s DEF weirdd. So now, I’m kinda living by this:
I’m moving on.
I’m living with out regrets.
I’m not looking back.

The moving on is the choice i had to make to transition into this weird time till my life is sorted out in this area.
The living without regrets is that I’ve chosen not to regret where I was, but rather look @ the good times I had and appreciate those. It’s not that I did anything wrong really with this area, but its just time to move on. And I’m learning to be ok with that.
And the not looking back, is not living in the past. I REFUSE, I REFUSE to live in the past ANY longer. I’ve wasted SO much of my life looking back, wishing things hadn’t happened, and I’m DONE with that! If you can’t tell, I feel very strongly about that ;).

So yea, that’s where I am right now!


Cross Current.

Filed under: Uncategorized — beyondtheoutside @ 2:40 PM

So, just thinking about friends. Pastor Matt gave a message on friendships @ Cross Current this past Saturday.
As I was thinking and considering some things about friendships, I was really…well, some things were really brought to my attention. Some specific things that stuck with me were….

*Friendships are ultimately about God. The foundation of EVERY friendship (or companionship) needs to be God. @ Caregroup this week, we talked again about friendships. We did a lil example with 2 X 4’s. And when they were laid on the rug, it was harder to walk across then when they were laid on top of one another (a hard surface that wouldn’t move), it was MUCH easier to walk across. And so when my friendships are built on shaky, moving grounds, the chances of them being beneficial to me are slim.

*Who you travel with, you WILL become like. I love to say that that’s not true and deny it with everything in me, but I cant any longer. I have written in my notes these words: STOP DENYING. in nice, big letters. I CAN’T deny that any longer. Who I am with, I WILL become like.

*My friends (gifts) should point me to the God (giver). I thought that was a cool lil thing to remember.

*It’s a slow, gradual change, and it starts with your feelings. That’s SO true….


*Do I love my friends enough that I would speak truth into their lives and reject their influence (assuming it’s negative)?

*Then the tables were turned and he said “Now, when I asked you to evaluate the affect your friends have on YOU, do you realize YOU were being evaluated?” And I was kinda like “uh, oh…wow” and I was wondering what things were thought. Am I a good influence? Do I really stick to my convictions, swaying for nothing? Many questions of the like ran through my mind. I def know i can be a better friend and want to stive towards that.

*Afterwards, when I was thinking about the msg, I was wondering WHY I don’t see the affect me (negatively. If it’s positive, I tend to notice it and all). And i know why (it’s SO simple!!) it’s because I don’t sit down regularly and think about my friendships and the influences and the changes in my character, conduct and everything. So I plan to do that way more often!

*And one lil quote: “if my friends aren’t friends of God, they shouldnt be my friends”



Another song… November 6, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — beyondtheoutside @ 12:07 PM

I’ve been listening to a lot of music recently, and this is one I’ve been listening to a lot since Sat night cuz I was riding in Allie’s car w/ people and we listened to it a lot and it got me hooked…made me cry once listening to it =]

Another rainy day
I can’t recall having sunshine on my face
And all I feel is pain
And all I wanna do is walk out of this place
But when I am stuck and I can’t move
When I don’t know what I should do
When I wonder if I’ll ever make it through

I gotta keep singing
I gotta keep praising Your name
You’re the one that’s keeping my heart beating
I gotta keep singing
I gotta keep praising Your name
That’s the only way that I’ll find healing

And can I climb up in Your lap
I don’t wanna leave
Jesus sing over me
I gotta keep singing

Can I climb up in Your lap
I don’t wanna leave
Jesus sing over me
Oh You’re everything I need
And I gotta keep singing