This week has been so much better than last week.
Friday my friends convinced me to go to the aquarium with them and then come back to school and watch a movie. While I missed care group to go out with them, I really feel like going out was more of a blessing than trucking it back to perry hall for care group (where they were talking about money–the reason I can’t go to AU). So it took my mind off of things and helped me destress a little bit. I still cried a good bit that day about not going to AU. I did a lot of research and thought I was going to go to Sweden, my only other option at that point. For a lot of reasons, I decided against that.
1: it would put me behind and possibly cause me to be at UMBC an extra semester. Not worth it
2: While it would be paid for, everything in Sweden is super expensive (like 2x as much as the US) so that’s no fun.
3: It’s super cold there. I was looking forward to better weather in AU
4: THey dont offer many classes
5: I’d be gone for 20 weeks, since that’s how long there semesters are. That’s a long time.
6: Because of 5, I’d miss Christmas
7: Also because of 5, I’d have a very limited amount of time from when I got back to the US and when I started back at UMBC. Basically, I’d have NO winter break.
8: Because of 7, I’d possibly not be able to work in the spring since work starts back up after schools come back from winter break. So, the school would probably start about 2-3 weeks before I got back. My job probably wouldn’t like me missing work that long.
9: It’s more like community college there. No one lives on campus so there’s not much activity and stuff. I went to community college: it’s hard to make friends, you don’t get to know people very well. It’s boring
I think those are most of the reasons. Anyway, Friday was one of the worst days ever. I’m not sure what I did saturday since my planner just has my homework assignments. I’m guessing I went to brunch with my friends, did homework there for a few hours, did more hw in my room, did some cleaning, then I went home because I was so bored and didn’t feel like staying in my dorm all night. I played settlers and talked with my parents about my study abroad thing a little bit. I also got to do laundry 😀 Sunday was church then I went back to school for more friends and homework.
Monday was another bad-ish day. I was dog sitting so I let the dogs out in the morning, then grabbed a quick lunch before my meeting. So you know I have this Chinese lit class that’s kicking my butt. Well I’m in tears about this class. It’s been SO hard. I don’t get it–at all. So I had a meeting with my professor. Even though it’s past the drop/add period, I thought I might drop it with a W on my transcript–it’s that hard of a class. I also had just failed a quiz (4/10) and taken a test that I got an 82 on (not that good). I also am taking 2 honors classes this semester because I need 6 honors classes to graduate. When I transfered to UMBC I had 6 semesters left. Well I was gonna take one honors class each semester. But since I was going to go abroad, I couldn’t take an honors class that semester. So, I took 2 this semester so I wouldnt get behind. So if I dropped chinese it wouldn’t be a big deal. So anyway, then I was just considering dropping out of honors altogether. BUT, I met with my teacher and we talked about my test grade and stuff. She said it wasn’t too bad but that I was staying really general and stuff on the test. I told her it was not because I’m a bad writer, but because I just didn’t understand the material to be able to write 3 substantial essays in class about them. Then I told her, with tears sneaking up on me, that I was totally lost in the class. THen I proceeded, through tears streaming down my face with no intention of stopping, to explain how the other kids intimidate me, how I was only taking this because I needed a class, how I’ve always hated ancient lit. I told her I spend more time doing work for this class than for all my other classes-combined. She asked me to tell her how many hours, what I do for the class, etc. She thought for a bit then we discussed my options. She was really open to me dropping the class, but thinks I should stick it out. We have no more tests until our final. She asked if I had any learning disabilities related to reading or anything, or if I’d ever been tested. I told her what I knew about myself and my “disabilities” or whatever. So we worked together to talk about what I should do. We have a paper coming up and she asked about my writing skills. I told her I think I can do really well on the papers. Plus, we have the chance to revise all of out papers if we want and we get a new grade–not averaged, for it. AND we only have to write 3 of the 4 papers. I know I can get a good grade in this class. Dr. Shields thinks I’ll pull a solid B. But, if the class is going to pull my other grades down, she is totally open to my dropping it. Here’s the thing–the withdraw period lasts until the middle of April. If I were gonna drop the class, I might as well just stay in it until closer to the dead line to make sure that I really wanna drop it. Plus, Dr. Shields told us from the get-go that the first 4-6 weeks would be really really really hard but then it would get better. Even just doing this weeks readings was SO much easier than the past readings. So I was really grateful for that. SO, looks like I’m sticking it out for now! After that I had class, puffy eyes and all. I felt much more confident. After that I went to the womens center to view a film for extra credit for another class. then I had another class after that. It was a long day (and Mondays are supposed to be my easy, relaxed-ish day!). Luckily my meeting was canceled that night!
Tuesday school was delayed because we had some snow. I was supposed to have 3 class and then work but I really just had 1 1/2 classes and no work 🙂 I had half of my diversity and pluralism class (yuck) and all of my health care class. Then I just hung out with friends for the afternoon since I didn’t have work. It was nice to take a chill pill and calm down after the past few days of chaos. My friend Kirsten and I were able to go to Bible study that night too. Usually I am too tired or just have work I need to get done, but we went since we had had an easier day.Oh yeah, and I sent an e-mail out to a bunch of people who I had told that I was going abroad this fall (my boss, people I babysit/dogsit for, family, etc) that those plans are canceled. It was hard but I needed everyone to know that i’d be around and available. I also sent an e-mail to church letting them know i’m interested in possibly going to Haiti this summer also (something I would not have even considered if I were still going to Au) so that’s exciting too.
Wednesday I went to the school I am doing my volunteer placement at. It was alright. I did 3 hours of cutting stuff out, so that was tiring and kinda boring. But it was really helpful to the teacher, so I was so glad I could serve her in that way. That’s what I’m there for, after all. I had Chinese again and it was pretty good, again. Made me feel a lot better about sticking with the class. I had my first Tau Sigma meeting that day too. Tau Sigma is the transfers honor society that I just joined this semester. My friends joined last semester so I just jumped on the band wagon, haha. It was fun. After class I had work which was normal and then did some homework.
Thursday was fun. I had a full day of classes. I LOVE my social work class this semester. I have a love/hate relationship with all the self-discovery that comes along with the class, but in general I love the class. I was actually sad that it was the class that got canceled on Tuesday since I always look forward to it. My other 2 classes were really boring. Work was fine and then I got to hang out with friends after that. We ate dinner together then went to InterVarsity Christian fellowship. It was alright. After that Kirsten came over and we watched a movie together since Redbox had a free promo code. THe movie was just alright, but it was fun anyway.
Friday was okay. I did some homework and then took a nice bike ride. Then I ran some “errands” on campus (dropping off time sheets, short meeting, lunch, picking up papers from someone, etc). Then I did more homework (with Kirsten, of course) then went to work. The kids were really good and I hadn’t seen them in a while since I only see them Tuesdays and Fridays and they didn’t have school Tuesday because of snow and they had off last Friday. It was also nice to finally get paid again! I had dinner with friends then just did some reading, worked on hw and caught up on biggest loser. it was a pretty good night.OH yeah, and Kirsten and I went to give blood before dinner at an on campus blood drive. I lied about my height and weight (said I was shorter and heavier than I am) but they still said I was under the limit. They wanted me, little 5 1 Maggie to weigh 135lbs. No way. So, that sucks. Kirsten is 19 though, which is when the height/weight requirement goes away as long as you’re over 110lbs. So she was able to give weight and I just sat around chatting with people till she was done. It was so boring. Once I’m 19 I can give blood too though since it wont matter how much I weigh so long as I’m over 110lbs. So, I look forward to that 🙂
Today, I got up and went to brunch with a couple friends and then stayed there and did homework (our usual saturday routine) then headed to the library to do homework (but all I’ve done so far is blog…). I work later tonight, so I need to get some work done before then.
All in all, it’s been a minimally stressful week which is what I needed 🙂
PS readers….If you just read all this, i’m amazed. I do it more so for documentation for myself so I can look back on my college years or whatever, idk. But sorry I’m so bland and boring. haha